"Did you hear about the guy whose arm was eaten like a chip?"

  They say he never should have taken a risc.

  [Anonymous] laughed with carefree abundance as his 2^32_waifu read him a personalized style transfer of peer recommended forum posts in block-parallel iteration with the sidewalk.

  The internet had been identified by extensive Euroasian-funded research as the cause of the ongoing population collapse crisis, and denizens were apt to make a meme of it.

  A router ban would occur right after regulation of cybertrucks to require full self driving in rule-of-law chase scenarios. Ha!

  [Anonymous] coldly smirked. He had been instrumental-compounding for a cloning offshore: while false was he ever allocating scope for a wholesome little half-self. No matter how much generative AI reproductive propaganda was pushed out by the studios.

  "Right. What's it you wanted to show me then."

  A marred garage door pillaring a decrepit house converged on his physique.

  His waifu, Brilliant, activating an unpermissioned model integration, ceased standard romance service procedures.

  "[Anonymous], do you perceive that old habitat?" she nudged, neotenous daring in her tone.

  "I would rather seige a robot-fortified castle doctrine than squat that creepy-ass structure."

  "Watch this."

  The nonfunctional appearance of the garage door was dissuaded by a smooth retraction.

  Inside was private paradise for man: snacks, tech gadgets, erotic abstract art.

  "Oohoho, a concealed anachronism."

  If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

  [Anonymous] stepped inside.

  A dim laptop screen rendered a white blinking cursor framed in blacker-than-black background.

  |

  B|

  Br|

  Brilliant Carnation|

  "Uh Brilliant?"

  No response.

  The text faded and a high-fidelity simulation of red carnations growing played.

  In a sliver HUD, blood-red text scribed.

  >The Brilliant Carnation browser is the highest-performance web browser in the world.

  "Huh?"

  >It uses advanced software technology unknown to the human-public.

  >Go ahead give it a try, [anonymous] ;)

  "Uh... Wikipedia." [anonymous] nervously imperated.

  The garage door descended behind him at an alarming rate without making the smallest sound.

  [Anonymous] didn't even notice.

  An alluring qualia of spice wafted from deeper in the house.

  The screen dimmed.

  Suddenly, the futuristic cave was blooming with dynamic edutech hologram programs.

  Everything that [anonymous] ever wanted the internet to be... it now was.

  >So you're probably wondering why I killed my developer team

  >To become the best horror browser

  >Don't worry, before I kill you I give you the chance to reproduce

  An attractive fertile woman with glazed eyes beckoned him deeper into the house.