What if you were my student?

  Zhao Shuiguang stayed at home for a night and returned to school early next morning.

  The dormitory building was still quiet in the early morning, Zhao Shuiguan opened the big door and came in. The dorm mother was throwing clothes into the washing machine in the hall, looked up at Zhao Shuiguan, Zhao Shuiguan obediently shouted: "Auntie, good morning." Without looking at her expression, he hurried to go upstairs.

  This group of old ladies is more troublesome than the other, wanting to tidy up the dormitory, clean the water pool, not allowing students to sleep in the dormitory until 2 pm, and managing everything. They even gossip about students' private lives when they have nothing better to do.

  The morning light shone just right into the corridor, Zhao Shuiguan walked all the way up, some dormitories had already gotten up and started washing, some dormitories had people hugging their quilts and putting them out to dry on the railing. Some were holding books and might be going to class.

  Zhao Shuiguang walked to the entrance of his dormitory and happened to hear Xu Ying's voice: "Yang Yang, are you going to the cafeteria? Can you help me bring a steamed bun, it's stuck on my desk."

  Zhao Shuiguang bumped into Yang Yang who was just about to go out and said: "So early, buying breakfast?"

  Yang Yang said "en", nodded randomly. Zhao Shuiguan saw this and also guessed roughly, didn't say much, walked into the house.

  Peng Xiaoxiao was reading on her seat, looked up and saw Zhao Shuiguan, smiled a bit unnaturally and said: "Back already?"

  Zhao Shuiguang muttered to herself, "Nothing to do at home, might as well come back early." Turning her head, she saw Xu Ying folding the quilt. Xu Ying didn't look up and asked, "Is your tooth better?"

  Zhao Shuiguang nodded and said: "En, pulled out." He sat down in his own position, and everyone didn't know what to say, a room of silence.

  Zhao Shuiguang knew that it was actually not others' fault, after staying in the same dormitory for several weeks, they had become very close and would talk about anything. For example, she knew that Xu Ying's boyfriend was studying in Ningbo, Yang Yang had a childhood sweetheart, Peng Xiaoxiao didn't say, but her boyfriend was Teng Yang's roommate.

  The closeness between girls often starts with the exchange of secrets, and the most important thing is to understand each other's emotional history, which is quite different from boys' "not fighting not knowing each other".

  Zhao Shuiguan knew that to hear others' secrets, she had to exchange her own secrets, but she didn't want to listen, especially since her secret was one that couldn't be spoken. Never mind, she told herself, Zhao Shuiguan, things will get better eventually!

  After a while, Yang Yang bought breakfast and came back. The people in the dormitory sat in a row at their respective desks, silently eating breakfast or reading books.

  After a while, Yang Yang couldn't take it anymore and slammed the book shut, saying: "I'm suffocating! Xiaoguang, what's going on here?"

  Yesterday afternoon, Xu Ying accompanied Shui Guang to the infirmary and then came back by herself. They asked: "Where's the person?" Xu Ying just casually said: "Went home." At night, people from other dormitories came over to play and mentioned this matter, asking: "Ah, you guys don't know? Really?"

  Yang Yang didn't believe it at first, joking that Zhao Shui Guang was not bad-looking and had a good figure, but it was absolutely impossible for him to be with someone as heavenly as Tan Shu Mo. But after seeing Xu Ying's gaze, she understood more than half of it.

  It's absolutely impossible to say that they didn't know, the four of them who were always together, good or bad things never hidden from each other. They truly treated others with sincerity, but others hid such a big thing from them. Yangyang is a straightforward person, how could she not understand?

  When girls get together, they always discuss and gossip. After a discussion like this, even a perfectly normal person can be made to seem suspicious and become unfamiliar.

  Zhao Shuiguan was reading an English book, but no matter how many times she looked at the letters, they just wouldn't sink in. When she heard what Yangyang said, she was stunned. She heard Yangyang still calling her "Little Light", and there was still room for maneuver. She quickly sat up straight and said: "Alright, alright, adults, I've confessed, isn't that enough?"

  As soon as he said that, the other three people burst out laughing. Xu Ying ran over and gave Zhao Shuiguan a slap on the back of his head, saying: "Don't be so cheeky, speak properly." Her eyes were full of laughter, but her face was stern.

  Xu Ying is a meticulous girl, on the first day of school, she was busy tidying up and saw that girl named Zhao Shui Guang sitting at the door, texting calmly. At that time, she thought to herself that this girl must be from a local university, so arrogant, definitely a spoiled rich girl who can't bear hardships.

  But an eighteen-year-old girl who had so many thoughts, went to the bathroom together, and the two of them laughed, she also found that this girl was quite lovely.

  Later, as they spent more time together, Zhao Shuiguang would bring back all sorts of food every time he returned home and share it with everyone. For several months after the start of school, Xu Ying and the others had eaten Zhao's mother's cooking more often than their own mothers'. Recalling her previous thoughts made her feel a bit embarrassed.

  In the dormitory, at first, Zhao Shuiguan would say: "Xu Ying, still eating almonds?" A bag of nuts was stretched out in front of her, and Xu Ying was initially embarrassed to eat too much from others, all of which were encouraged by Zhao Shuiguan. Later on, it became that Xu Ying said: "Zhao Shuiguan, I'm hungry, where's your bag of almonds?" Her face grew thicker. Conversely, Zhao Shuiguan would also say: "Xu Ying, give me some of your potato chips to eat."

  The only problem is that Zhao Shuiguan is too lazy, taking her things is no problem, but she must help put them back in their original place, otherwise she will grumble and complain for a long time, clothes and other things are all washed at home.

  It's just like this kind of interaction that they have some misgivings about her secrecy in their hearts. Everyone is so familiar with each other, aren't they?

  But putting herself in others' shoes, Xu Ying thought that if she were in their position, it wouldn't be easy for her to speak up either.

  Everyone in the dormitory moved their stools together, and Zhao Shuiguan had no choice but to roughly tell them about what happened from her high school graduation summer vacation with Tan Shumeng until now. In fact, she was very embarrassed to mention such things, but there was no other way.

  After finishing speaking, Yangyang grasped Zhao Shuiguan's hand and said: "Fellow student Shaoguang, you're too wealthy, we'll hang out with you from now on."

  Zhao Shuiguang looked at Peng Xiaoxiao, who was also excited, and really had nothing to say. Anyway, she wasn't a normal person, and the people in her dormitory weren't normal either. Comrade Zhao Shuiguang deeply believed this.

  Zhao Shuiguang would still remember such a morning many years later, and the fresh morning light that poured into his dormitory at that time.

  Accompanying the leaders of the courtyard to receive guests, after sending off the visitors, they passed by the gym and happened to see that child taking a physical education elective class inside, standing in a row practicing Tai Chi.

  He recalled the last time Zhao Shuiguan came to his office after physical education class, lying on the sofa and kicking his legs, complaining: "I knew I shouldn't have chosen Tai Chi! This teacher is too cruel, starting with a 4-lap run and then doing frog jumps! Look at me, he's almost training me into Schwarzenegger! All muscle!"

  He had long known that long-distance running was the child's weakness, and seeing her struggling to keep up, he couldn't help but smile. He dropped his pen and said, "Where are your muscles? Let me take a look." He walked up to her, pretending to lift her clothes, and Zhao Shui Guang quickly jumped up, saying, "Teacher Tan, come on, I'll show you." She stood with her feet apart and said, "Draw a big watermelon," drawing a circle in the air. Then she said, "Half for you," cutting the circle in half with one hand and pushing it to the left side. "And half for me," she added. Before she finished speaking, she shouted, "I'm going to take a bath!" and scurried out of the room like a little hamster.

  Tan Shu Mo leaned against the sofa, covering his face and chuckling quietly. This kid was still afraid, but also didn't want to be too obvious, fearing it would hurt his self-esteem? It's really too adorable.

  It's been a long time ago, talking about the book ink now, it still brings a smile to my heart. He stood far away, squinting his eyes, watching that child draw a big watermelon in the air with a flourish. A smile crept up to the corner of his mouth, and now he's doing much better than back then.

  "Is this the kid?" Tan Shu Mo suppressed a smile and turned around, seeing the chubby Dean standing behind him, smiling at the sports hall where he was originally looking. Tan Shu Mo nodded his head and shouted: "Dean Qian", Dean Qian was an elder he was very familiar with, in private, he always called him "Old Qian".

  Dean Qian is over fifty years old. To be able to hold this position in the hospital, he must have some ability. Having weathered many storms, he naturally has a calm and composed demeanor.

  President Qian was taken in by Tan Zhongjiao when he went north to study, and was able to worship under the gate of such a literary giant. President Qian remembered this kindness for his whole life.

  It was later learned that Tan Shu Mo was actually the second grandson of Tan Zhongkai's family, and Dean Qian couldn't help but try to promote him on his own initiative, only to find out that Tan Shu Mo had such a proud bone, project declaration, paper research, all done by himself, not even a bit of deceit. He couldn't help but feel that being born into a noble family really has its advantages, just like his grandfather and father.

  Dean Qian was not in a hurry, for someone like Tan Shumeng could be absorbed into their institute, and it was only a matter of time before he achieved fame. Indeed, Tan's economics papers were published one after another overseas, and Dean Qian also knew that Tan was a sought-after consultant in the industry, sighing that "the rear waves of the Yangtze River push forward the front waves".

  Unexpectedly, such a proud son of heaven would spread such rumors. Dean Qian didn't believe it at first, but as someone who had been through similar experiences, he was shocked when he saw the usually passionate eyes from afar.

  "Dean Qian: 'Xiao Mo, you're also someone I've seen grow up. There have been some unpleasant rumors going around lately.'"

  "Money, I have boundaries." A faint smile: "The school doesn't prohibit teachers and students from being together, does it?"

  Dean Qian coughed and looked at the young man's face, saying: "Teacher Tan, I'm also a veteran. What's the point of this? A bright future, for no reason, providing others with something to talk about."

  Tan Shu Mo's eyes didn't blink, saying without hesitation: "Qian Lao, I understand what you said. I just made a choice that an ordinary person should make. If it's really as you said, it can only be explained that everyone values not the knowledge but my private affairs with Tan Shu Mo. It's better to leave early." Xiang Xiang also said: "Qian Lao, thank you, I know what is most worth cherishing."

  At first, Tan Shu Mo didn't think he would be a teacher all his life, but he couldn't bear to part with Zhao Shui Guang. He was an arrogant person anyway, what's there to be afraid of? Today's situation is also within his expectation. If he really can't become a teacher, with Tan Shu Mo's experience, he won't have to worry about finding another place to go.

  Dean Qian looked at him so calm and collected, it was really a headache. The most troublesome thing was encountering this kind of person who was not surprised by honor or shame, and he really didn't know what could move him. He patted his shoulder and said hastily: "Xiao Mo, I didn't mean that, but the other party is just a child, is it worth it?"

  Dean Qian's generation was a marriage of parental arrangement, with a mature wife, not much love to speak of, but life is just about getting by, a man with a stable family makes people think he's a responsible person, and his career will also be on the rise. He really doesn't understand what's wrong with young people nowadays, loving this and that, he thought Tan Shumeng was someone who understood things clearly, didn't expect him to be like this too, he originally wanted to say what does that little girl know? After hearing Tan Shumeng's words, he naturally understood that she carries significant weight in his heart, and changed the subject.

  Tan Shu Mo leaned to one side, her hand in her sleeve, gazing at Zhao Shui Guang who was closing his eyes to practice nearby. The noisy sounds of practice within the hall seemed to fade away, and the sunlight filtering through the skylight above fell upon her. Her hands moved ceaselessly, tracing gestures, as the light danced across her soft hair, her slender fingers, and her delicate face, making her appear warm all over. Suddenly, his heart felt a surge of warmth and happiness that threatened to overflow.

  Tan Shu Mo closed his eyes and said: "Qian Lao, you are a veteran of the literary world. Do you remember what the poet Neruda once said? 'When the beautiful leaves fall off, the veins of life become clear.'"

  "He pointed to a point in the distance: 'That child is like a tree trunk from the north, clear, brave and strong.'"

  Many people have asked him why he would talk about such a young love affair, but he just smiled.

  He talked about his childhood in Beijing with his family, then went to the UK for further studies, and later worked in Jiangnan. After 28 years of traveling around China, he had seen enough cities and experienced enough ups and downs to write a book. As for women, he had met many and didn't care much about their background or appearance; as long as they got along well, that was fine with him. However, being intelligent, he could see through people and things too easily. Talking about romance with someone like himself made him tired, and he preferred to be with someone who wasn't calculating. Of course, he wasn't the type to go for younger women just for the sake of it; if he really liked someone young, he would have chosen them long ago.

  Zhao Shuiguang was much more sensitive than his peers, at first like a southern leaf, shaking her head and tail there, full of spring. As he got closer, he touched the tender branches, she was actually an extremely sensitive child but strongly carrying a piece of memory smiling. After being with her, he went up step by step, every small movement of hers made him feel tender, when she liked something, she would express her joy with gestures, when she didn't like it, she would sit silently, to avoid hurting others, she wouldn't say much either, all of this was his long-lost sincerity.

  Liking someone, there's always that moment when he crashes into her heart. He looks at her and suddenly remembers his grandfather taking him on a train to Tianjin in his childhood. On that day, despite the cold winter, he saw the branches of trees passing straight outside the window, filling him with inexplicable emotion.

  As people get older, they become more adept at hiding themselves, learning to say things that don't come from the heart, and even doing things they dislike. Over time, all their actions become second nature, and sometimes they even take pride in their own little schemes. Later on, when they see others being so persistent, they think it's abnormal, forgetting that they too were once young.

  What is worth it and what isn't, he has never measured, he has his own persistence, for Zhao Shuiguan's affairs, he will not let go.

  Tan Shu Mo stood up straight, still staring at her in the distance, and said: "It's not about whether it's worth it or not, for her, I'm willing to do it!"

  Dean Qian said no more, sighed, and walked away with his hands behind his back.

  The book and ink are leaning against the tree, hooking the corner of his mouth, thinking, Zhao Shuiguan, ah, Zhao Shuiguan, for you, I have said all the awkward words in my life!

  Afternoon was the class of Tan Shu Mo, Zhao Shui Guang walked into the classroom and wanted to curse "rely", usually not very crowded staircase classroom, was actually full of people, Yang Yang winked at her and said: "I know, talk about high-quality charm, your scandal is spreading faster than bird flu!" Just finished speaking, she was pinched by Xu Ying: "What scandal, can't you speak properly?"

  Zhao Shuiguang smiled and shook his head, and under everyone's gaze, he finally found a seat with difficulty.

  This semester, Ben teaches international trade finance. He arrives on time and ignores the crowd, lecturing as usual. At the end, he says: "In two weeks, there will be a final exam covering chapters 1-9 from the beginning of the semester. There will be 40 multiple-choice questions and 5 essay questions. If you have any questions, come to my office on Thursday." Then he packs up his books and leaves.

  Suddenly, the classroom was filled with complaints. Tan Shu Mo was notorious for making questions out of his own books, and no one dared to ask him to highlight key points or haggle over prices.

  Zhao Shuiguang and the others took out their books and walked behind, listening to a girl next to them say: "That's Zhao Shuiguang from Class One."

  Zhao Shuiguang expressionlessly brushed past the two people with her dormitory mates, she felt like she was being trained to have a body as hard as diamond. All she could think was that such days had finally arrived.

  The girl behind said: "Ah, it's nothing much."

  Xu Ying listened and turned her head to glare at the person with a fierce gaze, Yang Yang and Peng Xiao Xiao almost popped their eyes out.

  Xu Ying glanced at Zhao Shui Guang, who was holding her phone and reading a text message. Her face was calm and unruffled, but the small movements of her fingers on the keyboard betrayed her agitation. Xu Ying didn't understand why this group of women always judged people by their appearance. In her opinion, some girls were very pretty but couldn't be considered beauties because they lacked the temperament of a beauty. Some girls weren't particularly good-looking, but had a unique temperament that made them absolute beauties.

  Zhao Shuiguan belongs to the latter.

  The girl in front of them was also talking about Zhao Shuiguan: "That girlfriend who talks about books and ink won't be bothered with the exam, she'll definitely get a hundred!"

  Xu Ying was really angry and said coldly: "Some people did not do well in the exam, but they still want to make excuses." The girl in front turned her head back in fright.

  Zhao Shuiguang pulled at Xu Ying, she wasn't one to care about what others said, but herself was so angry that she wanted to rush up and slap them, yet her mouth was on her own body, the more she cared, the more people talked.

  She didn't do well on the exam, and people said Tan Shumeng had such a girlfriend. She did well on the exam, and people said Tan Shumeng was holding back.

  Who says that the children of teachers must study well, your grandfather's, it's killing her! This weekend you can't play again, for the sake of studying, she'll just have to obediently stay in the library.

  Zhao Shuiguang walked out of the school gate, said goodbye to his dormitory mates, and under the gaze of a group of people with wide eyes, boarded the 530 bus bound for Tan Shu Mo.

  While driving, Ben asked her: "Why did you agree to let me come pick you up just now?"

  Tan Shu Mo came to pick up Zhao Shui Guang to go to the hospital for an IV, he always waited for her at a distance outside the school gate after class and sent a text message: "Waiting for you at the school gate."

  She thought she would refute him, but instead she replied: "Good." He really waited for her there.

  Zhao Shuiguang threw the book into the car and said, "If I take your car, people will talk; if I don't take your car, people will still talk. It's better to save some effort and walk a few steps less." He gave him a resentful glance, it was all his design.

  Tan Shu Mo had one hand on the steering wheel and the other leaning against the car window, propping up his head to chuckle quietly. Zhao Shui Guang was extremely annoyed, and gave him a gentle elbow nudge, but Tan Shu Mo caught his elbow instead. He raised an eyebrow and asked, "Angry?"

  Zhao Shuiguan took back his elbow, looked at him staring ahead while driving, and sighed: "Forget it, who has the energy to keep thinking about others' business for so long? I expected this would happen today. Never mind!"

  It's not like she's a celebrity, only fools would come to negotiate with her, besides, the world is so big, except for family and a few friends, who would really care about you for so long? If you want gossip, go ahead. Don't be ridiculous, Zhao Shuiguan wouldn't miss out on something wonderful just because of this little setback!

  She thought of something and asked: "Is everything okay with you?" Tan Shu Mo tilted his head, raised a smile and said: "What could I possibly have going on."

  This kid is actually worried about him, what else could he possibly have going on?

  Tan Shu Mo could imagine the hardships this child had endured, but as a man and as her teacher, he couldn't say anything to comfort her. There were some things she had to face on her own! All he could do was offer subtle guidance from the side.

  This was also a kind of exercise for her, he was willing to let go and see her try, fortunately, she could handle it.

  Staring at his handsome profile, Zhao Shui Guang smiled and said: "At least now I can sit in your car under the bright sun, later on I can directly go to your office to find you, when you're free you can accompany me to eat lunch together, you have time we can also take a walk around the campus, this is enough."

  Letting go and letting go, there is gain in letting go, she understands this truth. She knows that she already has a lot.

  He saw her satisfied smile as he glanced at the book and ink, stopped the car, and pulled over.

  He had never attended university in his home country and didn't really understand what normal college couples did, only today did he realize that she had always yearned for that kind of life, but had never mentioned it, considering the two of them.

  It turned out that ordinary romantic trivialities had become a luxury for her.

  His heart involuntarily filled with pity, he stretched out his hand and cradled her face, the scorching fingertips delicately rubbing against her soft cheeks, the skin under his fingers flushing a circle of redness, he gently swept aside the scattered hair on her forehead.

  Zhao Shuiguan only saw the starry light in his eyes, which made her heart beat rapidly and her face turn red as if it was about to spit out fire. She stared at his good-looking lip corners as they approached, coolly and calmly sticking to her forehead, and at that moment, she felt like her forehead had been branded with a scorching hot iron.

  The cars whizzed by quickly around them, the pedestrians flowed endlessly on the street, and in the reflective brown glass, his sensual thin lips were printed purely on her forehead.

  In the faintly red face of the sunset, the silver body of the car shines with a dazzling golden light of happiness.