“So it seems it didn’t work… or at least partially didn’t work?”

  I stretch performatively in my bed, having long since escaped the need to do anything of the sort.

  …

  Oh right. I… never really did have muscles or anything like that…

  Except that I did.

  And don’t.

  Sighing, I glance over at my fae wife. She’s still wearing her headset, still within the dream that is our new little life together… in a sense.

  I wonder if it’ll be a problem in the future that there are two fae foxkin by the name of Olive… although I suppose it never really was her name, not permanently.

  No, she was always Artemis, at least as long as I’ve known her.

  And that’s fine.

  The whole reason we’re here, in my bed, is because she and Izzy had insisted that I should be here when I’m playing the game, so I wouldn’t keep coming close to falling off my throne. Which I’d apparently been doing, much to my second first wife’s concern.

  Huh. It just occurred to me that even though I’ve railed on the gods’ insistence on playing games with mortals’ lives for their own entertainment, I’ve created yet another means to do the same. And then I started playing it. Am I truly no different from them?

  …

  Nah. I’m way better.

  But still… what to do about Sadie.

  Or rather, Sidra Vossen. An eldra girl, sixteen years old, on a plane I haven’t even bothered to retain the name of. Freshly ascended because of Arty and I interfering in her life.

  Don’t get me wrong, it doesn’t bother me. It’s more… observations.

  And her emotions.

  They’re so real. So raw. Is that normal for young mortals? I think I had a period of that, long ago before Erebus…

  …

  Before big sister tried to destroy me.

  …

  …

  Well. Enough of this melancholy. It’s not like I’m ever going to recover, not if I haven’t in the hundreds of years it’s been since that all happened.

  I have other things to think about anyway… like whether or not I want to cheat.

  Sort of.

  Of course I’m going to, I’m Extra Life’s administrator, so why wouldn’t I have a finger or even a whole hand in that pie? It’s not like mother set any different of an example for me. And besides, my plan to get my alter ego into the system failed in the most fascinating way…

  Really though? Shoving the Status into an existing mortal? How strange. I don’t remember having added any kind of features like that, but I suppose it could have been an edge case. I’ll have to try to find and patch it later.

  Maybe.

  Okay, no, I won’t bother. It’s below my concern. We’ll just call it an interesting feature, a surprise for some new players. I’m not even going to document it! Yes indeed, it’s a feature, no question.

  Well then…

  How exactly to cheat… or at least give me a leg up… or rather, Sadie.

  She’s going to be an adventurer. We decided that not even an hour ago, and she’s sleeping peacefully in her bed. The next real decision is what kind of adventurer… her Class anyway.

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  Her mother is a mage, and her mana reserves are pretty solid. And oddly enough, I can tell what her stat balance is. Nyx… I told myself long ago what my own stat balance was, that I’m a mental build, and the other two of myself were as well. Was that linked to my Akashic Self?

  Who knows.

  Anyway, Sadie is clearly a social build with mental as a relatively close second, at least compared to the third stat. Her low physical stat is probably part of why she’s kind of lazy… although that could just be related to how late she usually falls asleep, staying up to read her books instead.

  She certainly slept on time earlier though. All the day’s events drained everything she had to give.

  That doesn’t really matter though.

  Back to the actual issue…

  Hmmm. What kind of build do I want her to have? Maybe something I haven’t done before?

  I could probably make a gadget or something for her to level with, something to make it easier and to better guide her Class options and later overall build…

  …

  …!

  I’ve got it!

  Literally.

  I just need to make it a bit better… and done! Now, the last step…

  ***

  A sudden tearing noise jolts me awake, my eyes shooting open as I rush to stand…

  …Or I would have, if I could move. I struggle and strain, but it’s no use… nothing works.

  I’m trapped. I try to scream, but no sound comes out. The only thing I can move is my eyes, which dart around the room.

  There’s a… gate? A hole?

  Something. A dark abyss, yawning at the foot of my bed. An overwhelming pressure hits me, one that tastes strongly of glass and magic, the tang of fresh blood, the dust of time long since forgotten. Scorched earth.

  Destruction. Endless, all-consuming destruction, localized here in one small point.

  One person, standing in my bedroom. At least I think it’s a person… it seems more like a shadow made manifest, only recognizable by its outline, and those two red eyes staring a hole through me.

  Ah. I see. I’d read about this. Sleep paralysis.

  This is just a dream.

  The shadow of violence moves. Slowly, one step at a time, it draws to the side of my bed. It raises a hand, triggering an itchingly strong impulse to flinch, to flee, to hide and hope this night terror leaves me alone… And then I feel it.

  A hand brushes through my hair, almost gentle, and I blink in confusion. after a moment it breaks contact and a quiet voice reverberates in my mind.

  A boon is offered. Use it well, my Agent.

  Not one second past the last word, my consciousness falls away leaving me in a dreamless sleep.

  ***

  “Ha, perfect! I even left it off with a cryptic message. And it’s not like I actually… actually! No! I can! I really can!”

  “Mmm?”

  “Ah, sorry,” I quickly say, my excitement having woken Arty from her post-game slumber, though I’m not sure why chose to sleep. “I’m just… well. Plotting and scheming is probably too strong a phrase for it, but I guess setting up some interesting future events for our game together would be a fair enough way to put it.”

  She blinks sleepily at me before shrugging lightly, turning over, and going back to sleep.

  Which is fine. I have other plotting and scheming to go over anyway.

  First things first…

  ***

  “Sadie! You really need to remember to set your alarm!”

  Mom’s voice startles me enough that I flail in my bed, my new stats unfortunately not enough to prevent my sudden impact with the floor. I rub my new bruises and after making sure nothing broke I quickly put on my school uniform – it’s Monday after all, and I can’t just escape class… or can I?

  Nah, mom wouldn’t ever let me get away with that.

  I’ve mostly got my uniform on by the time I notice it… a piece of shiny black metal on the edge of my bed, not far from my pillow.

  At least I think it’s metal… in my hand it feels heavy and cold, almost more like glass, but the finish definitely feels like some kind of metal.

  Weird.

  …

  …No.

  I’m not willing to think anything about last night’s dream was real. No. It couldn’t have been. Nothing like that would happen to me, not at all. No way, no how, I don’t want the attention of any evil… things that want to give me ‘boons’.

  Nothing good ever comes of that, not in the stories I’ve read. I’d probably just end up dying in some horrible way, or tortured forever, or eaten by things nobody should even have to think about existing.

  So, no. This is definitely a gift from my mother, or some magic fairy that decided I needed something like this. Yeah, there we go! Whatever gave me this is definitely good, and right, and not at all evil or scary or made of shadow!

  …

  Although that doesn’t explain the fine black sand all over the carpet. It’s everywhere!

  But I’m going to pretend I just don’t see it – nope, no evidence of scary things here!

  I brush it from the bottoms of my socks as I close the door behind me, separating myself from the unknown space I’m deliberately not thinking about before I head down the stairs to where mom is waiting, just like she is every morning.

  And when I finally face her, her small smile drops replaced with a frown and furrowed brow.

  “Wh-what is it? Mom?”

  She takes a step closer and… smells the air?

  “Sadie,” she asks quietly, “why do you smell like blood? And your mana signature, it’s changed. Not a lot, but…”

  That’s when she notices the object in my hands. Her eyes widen.

  “Where did you get that?” she hisses.

  I flinch. “It was by my pillow! Really! You didn’t put it there? I thought you put it there!”

  Her brow furrows deeper, before her eyes flick to gray again… something she’d told me meant someone was using Identify.

  And her eyes widen even more. “Oh.”

  “What?” I ask, but mom just stares at me, dumbfounded.

  “That runepistol. It’s a unique item.”

  “Okay…? So what does that mean?”

  Before she has a chance to reply, I Identify the glassy weapon.

  [Covetous Wanderer – Runepistol (Unique) – Level 0]

  …

  Huh.