I wake up and realize that I died.... again....
'Shit! that fucking human stepped on me!!
ON PURPOSE!!!'
While I am fuming in anger I realize that I am in my old human body again. Then hear a voice behind me that sounds eerily like M*rgan Fr*eman.
"It doesn't feel good to die does it?"
I turn around and see a black guy that looks exactly like M*rgan Fr*eman.
"Holy shit! WTF! who the hell are you?"-Me
"I am God." -M*rgan Fr*eman
"Bullshit!" - Me
Suddenly I feel something wet and squishy land on my head. I fall down and the smell hits my like a freight train. I realize that it's shit...
"What the fuck was that for?" -Me
"SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH!" - God
His face turns into a mask of fury and his voice resounds all around the space around us and it is filled with power and I tremble in fear and I realize with my intelligent brain that the person before me is God.
"Are you done bitching?" - God
I nod my head slowly.
"Good. Now I have some things to tell you.
I saw how you lived on Earth and I didn't really like the way you were such a dick.
So... I am going to give you another chance of life.
I am giving your soul to a friend of mine who is a god because I lost to him in poker. His name is Arlinus the god of wealth, luck, and wisdom.
Do you have any questions? No? Good. Goodbye." -God
Before I had a chance to reply the scene changed and I saw an old guy that looked strangely very similar to G*ndalf except this guys was pimped out and had golden rings with jewels on them and a suit that looked like it costed thousands of dollars.
"Ah so God finally decided to pay back his debt with you eh?"-G*ndalf
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"I am Arlinus as you might have heard already and I am sending you into my world so that I may have some fun and laugh at you." -Arlinus
As I am about to reply to him I suddenly find that I have no mouth...
"Ah, yes I took away your mouth to shut you up so that you listen to my explanation before you start bitching about something." -Arlinus
"The world that you are about to go into is filled with magic and monsters. Like a fairy tale if I were to talk about things from your world's perspective. I decided to give you a chance to amuse me right now for benefits to your new body in this new world. I will give you 5 minutes to tell me a joke that will make me laugh. If you don't then no harm done, I will just let you reincarnate into a female sex slave. Time starts now." -Arlinus
Horrified I rack by brain to think of some random joke.
"What is yellow and black and makes you laugh?" -Me
"I don't know what?" -Arlinus
"A bus full of niggers falling off a cliff."-Me
"4 minutes and 10 seconds."-Arlinus
"What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
.... Sneakers!"-Me
"3 minutes and 40 seconds." -Arlinus
"Do you want to hear a clean joke?"-Me
"Sure."-Arlinus
"I took a bath with Bubbles."-Me
"..." -Arlinus
"Do you want to hear a dirty joke?" -Me
"Okay..."-Arlinus
"Bubbles is my next door neighbor." -Me
"hehe... HAHAHAHA..... that was a pretty good joke. Okay I decided that you are pretty funny so I will personally give you some benefits in your next life." - Arlinus
Then darkness again.
