A dozen yellow eyes were locked onto him, and a chill crawled up his spine as the goblins stared him down. They had long hooked noses, large pointed ears, and slimy looking mottled green and yellow skin that reminded him of toads. With an inadvertent step back, Xander found his hand on the hilt of his sword as he prepared to be chased down and assaulted.
“Traveller? Is everything alright?” asked a squeaky voice from behind the short bar top. Eyes darting that way, Xander opened his mouth to reply when his brain finally finished processing the information about what he was seeing. There was no blood or gore splattered about, no weapons out, and no cries of battle or fear from the handful of other patrons scattered throughout the common room. In fact, the goblins were all dressed in regular clothing and were carrying plates of food and mugs of drink back and forth. Their stares weren’t murderous, but curious, and most had already turned back to their assorted tasks.
“Traveller?” asked the goblin behind the bar again, and Xander shook himself free of his paralysis, taking a few hesitant steps forward again.
“Uh…” Xander said helpfully, still trying to understand what was going on here. Everything he had ever seen about goblins painted them as violent monsters, but that was very clearly not the case here. In fact, they clearly made up the staff at the inn, and even their matching garb looked simple but serviceable.
“Would you like a table and something to eat or drink? We also do have rooms available, as well as fishing from the back patio if you like” the squeaky bartender offered while pouring a few more ales from a barrel.
“Oh uh, sorry, it’s just that… uhh…” Xander trailed off for a moment, then felt both embarrassed and racist that he just assumed a whole race to be evil. “It’s just been a long day. I will take a room, yes, how much will that be for the night?”
“2G1 for one night, or 1G2 for two nights if you are planning on staying a bit longer?” the goblin said, sounding a bit hopeful. Xander rustled through his coin pouch, but found that he hadn’t actually brought any of the lowest tier of coins with him. So instead, he just put down a copper colored G2 coin. “I’ll probably only spend one night, but you can keep the change regardless. I don’t really need any food, but I’ll take a pitcher of water with me if that’s okay?”
“Oh, how very gracious!” the goblin said in high pitched excitement, bouncing up and down on the balls of its feet. “Of course, of course!! Water and a room it is for the lady!” Another goblin popped up from seemingly nowhere behind the bar and beamed at him, holding a small iron key. “Gertie show you to room now!” this second goblin said with nearly as much excitement as the first one had demonstrated.
Gertie grabbed the water pitcher from the bartender and then scurried around the bar to lead Xander to a staircase going up to the next floor. He followed in a bemused daze, too overwhelmed and tired to do anything else. His guide had to pause and wait for him a few times during the short journey up to the third floor, though she didn’t seem to mind much.
The goblin unlocked one of the rooms, offered him the key, then grinned from ear to ear in a disconcerting way “Gertie will be your maid and room service if you want anything. Just tug that cord and Gertie will come!” she pointed to a piece of rope that disappeared into the wall and presumably went all the way downstairs.
“Thanks Gertie, but I think I’ll be okay…” he said looking around the room as she left, then closed the door behind her. It was extremely basic with just a simple bed, a chest off to one side, a bucket in the corner, and (thank god) a large shuttered window. Pulling off his mask, armor, and clothes hastily, Xander went to the window and threw open the shutters with more enthusiasm than he should have, causing them to bang against the outside walls. He didn’t care at the moment and just reveled in the light breeze. The sun kissing his bare skin was almost sensual after being bundled up in all his gear for a day.
Still exhausted, he spent the effort required to drag the small bed underneath the open window before collapsing onto it. He wasn’t even conscious for long enough to feel the uncomfortable straw stuffed mattress poking him.
Hours later, Xander awoke with a stretch and a yawn. The room was dark by this point, and turning his head he saw the moon hanging there in the night sky. It was huge and bright; far larger than the moon on Earth had ever been and reflecting more light as well. He lay there for a long time, just resting and thinking.
His time here on Gaellus had been full of ups and downs and strange dichotomies. His first real job was to fight and possibly kill people, though it was supposedly for the greater good somehow. He was trapped in a female body and was no longer human, and yet was also happier and more confident in himself than he had been in a long time. Stronger too, and that was before including the magic the System granted him. He also had more time and resources to pursue his art than ever before, even though he had attended college for that very purpose. It helped that he didn’t need to sleep anymore. Well, most of the time anyway.
Yes, he had broken down a few times, but that was nothing new for him. Most of the time he was happier than he had been on Earth, though he did miss parts of his former life and his family. He was even enjoying fighting and getting stronger, though this latest development was definitely a setback. Being an infamous Dungeon Lord was troublesome enough, and now he knew he would have a hard time disguising himself for long periods of time. Well, there was still magic, so maybe he could find some kind of item or illusion that could do the job eventually. Just one more line to add to the list of things to look into.
Ella’s face floated up in his mind, and he got a warm feeling in his chest. He’d had crushes before, and something about her just had him hooked. He snorted at himself, amused. It was likely his own twisted sense of aesthetics at work, coupled with her kindness. She was far more interesting than any traditionally attractive girl, and he wanted to get to know her better. Even though he knew it was probably a bad idea, and it would be logistically difficult right now, there was just something special about her.
Xander pushed thoughts of Ella away with reluctance, and reflected that there was still a lot he didn’t know about Gaellus. Being tucked away in his dungeon without much in the way of company or literature certainly hadn’t helped. Mr. Sinclair was helpful, but only in matters pertaining to the dungeon or the System, while Caretaker mostly knew about dryads with a limited amount of information on a few other topics sprinkled in.
What he really needed was to find a library or some other place where he could study, or… hmmm… perhaps someone he could talk to and ask a bunch of questions. Rheagan would probably be a good choice, and he smiled a bit thinking about the noble. The swordsman really had done quite a lot to help Xander all things considered, even if some of it was probably a bit self-serving for the Heintfelds and adventurers in general.
The Firestarters had actually come back and run the gauntlet of the Grove of Bones a few times without Augustus of course. Xander had treated them like any of the other adventuring parties, playing the part of the evil Dungeon Lord, and both sides had held up their ends of the agreement. They had a definite advantage over him thanks to his fire affinity being -50, but it hadn’t all been one sided either. Xander had to shift around the traps and get inventive with his minions, but he had come out on top about half the time as well.
Of course, Ignaris had seemed positively gleeful when hurling balls of lava at him, but even the lava mage had begrudgingly held up their end and stopped attacking when Xander indicated he was below 25% HP. Everyone had walked away from their fights alive and with growing experience.
Somewhere outside, a beast howled, and the sound of it sent a chill down Xander’s spine. It was answered by another howl, then a third, and then a small chorus of them mixed with excited yips. They sounded quite distant, but he imagined that he could hear a savage hunger in them. The straw mattress suddenly seemed even less comfortable somehow, and so Xander finally stood to look out the window. Scanning in the direction that he thought the howls had come from, even the brilliant moon offered little light at any significant distance.
Frowning, he was unsure why the sounds were so unsettling to him. They sounded slightly familiar, but he couldn’t place them at the moment either. Xander was sure they weren’t normal wolves, or even the bramble wolves he had fought in the dungeon before he took it over, but couldn’t think of any other type of wolf that it might be offhand. After a few minutes they stopped altogether, and he tried to lay back and relax on the bed.
The straw mattress wasn’t any better this time around, and just laying there with his own thoughts was both uncomfortable and boring, so he decided to head downstairs and see if anyone was up. Half the point of coming to Little Bend in the first place had been to see if he could interact with people without giving himself away, and he was reasonably certain that Ella didn’t count. Without knowing what time it was, there was no way to know if anyone would even be down there, but he could always just wait around until someone came down for breakfast.
Dressing fully, he went down the stairs, wincing at every creak like a child afraid to get scolded for being up too late, only to find the tavern area to be devoid of customers. A single flickering candle lit the empty room, but once again Xander marvelled at how much he could see in the dark. As he tried to decide on where to sit and wait, he noticed that the room wasn’t entirely empty since there was a goblin bartender leaning on the countertop and watching him with oversized yellow eyes.
He froze in panic, totally unprepared for the decision in front of him. Would it be too awkward to sit at the bar in the dead of night and try to strike up a conversation? Or would it be even more awkward to sit alone at a table and thereby seem to shun the goblin? Maybe they would think he was racist? Xander didn’t know what to do, and stood frozen in place until the goblin asked “Can we help you, adventurer?”
“Oh I’m not an adventurer…” Xander corrected instinctively, mouth moving before his brain could process any useful thoughts.
“Then can we help you ma’am?”
“Oh I’m not…” Xander started, but got his tongue under control in the nick of time before he could give himself away again. He doubted there were many women going around insisting that they were men, and it could blow his cover. Before the pause could get any weirder he appended, “Hungry?”
“Mmmm… this is good because we do not have food ready yet. Anything else we can do? Or are you leaving?”
With a small shake of his head in the negative, Xander went over to sit at the bar. It was the height of a regular table instead of the normal height of a bar, so it felt a bit strange, but he imagined it had to be easier for the short creature working it. “To be honest, I don’t really need anything except for some conversation. I’m not exactly from around here and haven’t had much of a chance to chat with anyone, so I don’t know all the customs or whatever, and was hoping to learn” he said a bit sheepishly.
The goblin started hiccuping softly, or at least that's what it sounded like to Xander at first before he realized that it must be laughter. He would have blushed if he could, but just settled for putting his masked face into his hands in embarrassment. “Am I really that bad?” he mumbled through his fingers.
“No, no… we are sorry, no offense, so sorry!” the bartender wheezed slightly, trying to get ahold of themselves. “Not your fault, but no one talks to goblins much, and we not so good at speaking. But we will serve the adventurer however we can.”
Now that Xander was paying more attention, he suspected this was a different bartender from the one he had met earlier. He couldn’t really tell the facial features apart, but the voice was definitely different; not quite as high and squeaky. The goblin looked at him expectantly, and Xander shifted a bit in his seat “Ummm, well… I’m not really sure what to talk about either. Maybe tell me about your people? I haven’t ever met any goblins before.”
The bartender looked very surprised at that, and even tilted his head in confusion. “For true? Oh… you must be from very far then.” The goblin drummed his fingers on the bar in thought for a few seconds before asking with a bit of reluctance “What you want to know?”
“Uhhh, pretend I don’t know anything at all about your people. I think everything I knew about them is entirely wrong.”
“Oh… that is much to tell, and we thought you wanted conversation?” he asked, seeming to be a little uncomfortable with the idea of going over his people’s history for some reason.
“Errr, if you don’t want to talk about it, don’t feel like you have to. I was just curious.”
“The goblin people have much sadness and badness in past” the bartender said apologetically “But we can tell you if you want.”
“No no, that’s okay,” Xander said hastily, “If you don’t want to talk about it we can talk about something else. I will admit I’m curious, but part of the point of this is to know what to avoid talking about, and I have my own stuff that I wouldn’t really want to share, so it would be unfair to ask you to tell me about yours.” By the relieved look on the goblin’s face, it was apparent that he had made the right call.
“Okay, thank you adventurer, we can talk about something else then? Maybe where you from that you never met goblins?”
It was Xander’s turn to be reluctant. “Uhhh, yeah… I don’t… really think I can talk about that right now either.” Instead of being upset, the bartender just let out another hiccupping chuckle, and Xander shook his head in amusement. “Yeah, maybe I have even more to learn about conversing than I thought. But hey, apparently we have time.”
As if to refute his statement, another howl came from outside, but this time it was much closer. In fact, if he wasn’t much mistaken, it could have come from somewhere inside the small village. Xander found himself on his feet, reaching inside his core for magic and his connection to his minions before his thoughts had time to catch up with his actions. His reactions from fighting as the Dungeon Lord had apparently ingrained themselves quite deeply already, though he was quickly reminded that he hadn’t brought any minions with him when there was no response.
“Well fuck…” he grumbled, though there was some amusement in his tone. “It would be stupid to go see what’s going on out there, right?” he asked himself.
“But you are adventurer? You are strong, yes?” the bartender asked. The only reason Xander didn’t jump at the unexpected reply was because he had gotten used to plants replying to him randomly, but he had still forgotten there was another person around.
“Errr… yes, yes I am…” Xander said in a totally believable and not at all suspicious tone, acutely aware that the sword at his hip was not his preferred weapon. Then again, he had the very first passive ability he had ever earned still equipped.
Improvised Weapons (Passive): Anything can be a weapon in your hands. You intuitively understand how to deal at least minor damage with anything you are holding.
“I, the very strong adventurer, will go see what is happening” he told the goblin,