CROWN: Host death imminent.
An arrow split the air.
It punched clean through the wolf’s skull.
The body went slack and collapsed against Stripe’s chest.
He stared at the sky again.
STRIPE: I threw shit at it.
CROWN: Correct.
He shoved the carcass aside and sat up.
At the edge of the clearing stood an elf woman with white hair flowing past her shoulders. Her bow was lowered but ready. Her expression was not admiration.
It was disgust.
Sharp. Immediate.
Her eyes flicked from the wolf’s smeared face to Stripe’s nearly naked state, covered in the wolf’s blood and the shit he had thrown at the wolf.
She turned and walked away without a word.
Her memory would be forever haunted by what she saw.
STRIPE: That went well. I really showed that thing.
CROWN: Your contribution was minimal.
STRIPE: One point is a good start. I had it right where I wanted it.
CROWN: Deception detected.
He stood and looked down at the wolf.
Blood pooled beneath its head.
CROWN: Recommend host secure clothing to prevent sexual deviant classification.
STRIPE: Looks like we are going to be wearing wolf. Skinning. I was sober for this part of the show.
CROWN: Deception detected.
He crouched and grabbed a sharp stone. He began narrating as if he were a survival show expert.
STRIPE: You cut shallow along the belly. There’s like a line.
CROWN: False. No seam detected. Host is suggested to cu
Stripe cut the Crown off with his own narration and instructions.
STRIPE: There’s always a line. I remember this.
He cut too deep.
The stomach ruptured open and the smell rolled out like a physical force.
STRIPE: That’s new.
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.
CROWN: Intestinal tract compromised.
STRIPE: That was part of the plan.
CROWN: Technique inconsistent with optimal processing.
STRIPE: No, then you peel it like a banana.
CROWN: Analogy inaccurate.
He kept muttering instructions he half remembered while actively making it worse before slowly making it better.
Eventually he freed a heavy strip of hide and wrapped it around his waist.
STRIPE: Functional clothing.
CROWN: Odor levels have increased significantly.
STRIPE: That’s subjective.
He followed the sound of water and stepped into a river.
He scrubbed himself hard, dunking the pelt beneath the surface.
STRIPE: You rinse meat before cooking it. Basic rule.
CROWN: Rinsing does not eliminate contaminants.
STRIPE: It feels like it should.
Moments later fish began floating to the surface.
Stripe stared.
STRIPE: That seems dramatic.
CROWN: Residual toxins from wolf pelt contaminating water.
He grabbed one of the floating fish.
STRIPE: I don't smell that bad Jesus.
CROWN: Consumption not recommended.
STRIPE: The Japanese eat raw fish all the time its called sushi and its expensive.
CROWN: Wrong species for raw consumption.
He bit into it.
His stomach revolted instantly.
He staggered to the bank and vomited hard.
CROWN: Minor poisoning detected. Stabilizing.
Stripe wiped his mouth.
STRIPE: She takes booze away and leaves me this. That feels personal.
CROWN: Alcohol intoxication permanently disabled by divine modification.
STRIPE: I heard you the first time.
Text appeared in his vision.
Experience gained: 98.
Level 2 achieved.
Title acquired: Toxic Fisherman.
STRIPE: That title is slander.
CROWN: Title reflects environmental outcome.
CROWN: Bodily fluids are now slightly toxic and may inflict the poison status.
STRIPE: Thanks, now I'm even more disgusting.
CROWN: Host gratification noted.
Branches snapped nearby.
Several armed men stepped into the clearing.
CROWN: Multiple hostiles detected. Estimated Levels 3 through 5.
BANDIT LEADER: Oi. What crew you with.
STRIPE: I’m not with anyone.
BANDIT 2: Liar. Look at how your dressed.
BANDIT 3: Yeah looks like a real dirty cutthroat.
Stripe stepped forward towards the closest one with his arms raised in a defensive posture.
STRIPE: Look man, I am harmless I don't even have a weapon. Here check me.
Stripe suddenly pivots left foot forward. Right foot back. Quick and instant he leaned forward swinging his fist in an arch with all his body weight behind it.
The overhand right landed clean.
The left uppercut followed with natural rhythm.
CROWN: Sneak attack has landed with critical damage.
Then man began to fall forward completely unconscious.
Stripe in one motion quickly slipped behind him. His arm under his throat in an impromptu standing rear naked choke.
STRIPE: Nobody fucking move. I call the shots now.
CROWN: Hostage value less than ten percent.
STRIPE: Things are going to go different or I will break his neck right here.
You don't want his kids to not have a dad.
What about his loving wife at home.
Think before you fucking move.
A crossbow bolt punched through the hostage’s skull.
He went limp as blood dripped down his face.
His body kicked once before it stopped moving completely.
BANDIT LEADER: That was Greg. He was the worst of us. He killed kids and raped women.
Stripe let the body fall.
STRIPE: Yeah, I guess I'm okay with this.
BANDIT LEADER: Kill him.
Stripe ran.
┌──────────────────────────────────┐
STATUS
└──────────────────────────────────┘
Name: Stripe
Level: 2
Class: Unassigned
Title: Toxic Fisherman
HP: 110 / 110
Stamina: 102 / 105
Mana: 0 / 0
━━━━━━━━━━ Attributes ━━━━━━━━━━
Strength 6
Agility 7
Endurance 6
Intelligence 5
━━━━━━━━━━━━ Skills ━━━━━━━━━━━━
Hand-to-Hand Combat Basic Retention
Improvised Weapon Handling Beginner
Survival Novice
Minor Poison Secretion Passive
━━━━━━━━━━ Artifact ━━━━━━━━━━━
Crown of Reflection
━━━━━━━━━━ System Effects ━━━━━━
Alcohol Intoxication Immunity
Experience Calculation
