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Chapter V: Never ever say never ever

  It was already morning, and Ash had obtained all the information he needed from Dante after talking all night with Alfred. In a very cheerful mood, he left another small gold ingot on the table as a tip. Alfred, more than happy, saw him off with a smile as Ash walked out the door.

  Ash watched as the city began to fill with people, and calmly started walking down the street with all the calm in the world. However, that calm would soon be interrupted.

  A hand rested on his shoulder. Ash turned to see who was calling him: it was Pul, sent to watch him and make sure he did not cause any disaster. Ash looked at him… and for a moment he had to make an effort to swallow the laugh that was about to escape when he saw that they had sent the same gorilla he had beaten to guard him.

  — Wasn’t there a sexy soldier available? That would have been more than enough to keep me satisfied — he said, ironically.

  — Don’t get smart. No matter that you made a deal with the mingghan, that doesn’t make you a free man. Besides, we are not going to let a genocidal man walk around freely — Pul replied in a severe tone.

  — A genocidal man is someone who kills a large group of people with a specific purpose. I… have only reduced to ashes the battalions that charged against me. Keep well in mind the difference between a murderer and a warrior.

  — Whatever you are, you are still a very dangerous individual. So you will remain under surveillance until the commander decides otherwise.

  — Fine. If that makes you feel safe, no problem. Just don’t interfere in my affairs.

  — As if you had any affairs.

  — Just last night. I’m going to talk to someone, so stay away. Otherwise, I’ll become a very annoying person.

  — Don’t try anything strange.

  — It won’t be anything out of this world. By the way, where do people buy gold?

  At the café where Dante worked, he continued with his usual routine. However, the previous night had left him little time to sleep, and it showed on his face. After a brief break, he went out to attend the customers. In the center of the place, seated at the middle table, was Ash, waiting for him with the menu in hand.

  Dante, nervous, did not move from where he stood. He remained watching him carefully. Ash spoke in a relaxed tone:

  — Relax, I’m not going to do anything dangerous. I only came to apologize. In the end, I reached an agreement with your friend, and I think it’s better to get along with everyone since I’ll be living here for a while.

  Dante changed his expression from alertness to one of surprise and curiosity. Several of the employees and customers present were also paying attention to the scene, intrigued.

  With few options, Dante approached and asked:

  — What will you have?

  — Well, I wanted your services. You could say you’re the only person I know with free time to give me a tourist guide around the place — Ash replied.

  — Even if I wanted to do it… and I don’t… I’m working. I’m not going to risk my job for the psychopath who tried to kill me last night.

  — Technically it was self-defense. Besides, I already paid your boss for your free time — Ash said, completely calm.

  — What? — Dante exclaimed.

  He looked at his boss, who was counting the bills Ash had given him. The man looked back at him and, with a simple gesture, said:

  — Do it.

  Dante stood there speechless, not knowing how to react. While he was still processing the situation, Ash — already at the door — said to him:

  — Go change and let’s go. I’m hungry.

  Already walking through the streets, Ash commented:

  — Well, I don’t know about you, but I feel like I haven’t eaten in a hundred years. So you’ll have to take me somewhere where they serve a lot of food.

  Dante, visibly disgusted, asked:

  — How are you not locked up? Actually, how are you just walking around freely?

  — Oh, no. If you look over there, the gorilla is watching me — Ash replied, pointing with his thumb in a direction.

  Dante looked where he indicated and saw Pul a few meters away. He sighed, trying to calm himself.

  — Za, alright… I understand the situation a little now. But why are you coming to bother me?

  — I already told you, didn’t I? I just came to make peace.

  — I don’t think that’s something a mercenary who lived through one of the bloodiest wars in history would say.

  — Yeah… if you look at it that way, it may be ironic, but talking with your old enemies turns out to be a necessary tool — Ash commented.

  Dante still did not trust him, but seeing that he was a rather logical person, he decided to play along, and both of them began to walk.

  — Well, if you want, I know a place where they make a lot of good food.

  — But I also want them to cook it instantly. I’m very impatient when I’m hungry.

  — Don’t worry. As soon as you order it, they’ll already have it ready. It’s called “fast food.”

  — What? Does it have legs or something like that?

  Dante sighed. Of course, technically he was talking to an old man, so to avoid more absurd questions, he decided to explain it at once:

  — No. Nowadays there are places that specialize in preparing only one type of food. That allows them to be more efficient and faster when cooking, without losing quality. And thanks to that, there are also more restaurants specialized in specific dishes… and very tasty ones.

  — How interesting. And what do they cook at the place you’re taking me to?

  — Ramen. Do you know it?

  — Oh, perfect! Yes, I know it very well. It better be good, I’m going to be demanding — Ash said while rubbing his hands, hungry.

  — It will be, don’t worry.

  As they walked, Ash followed Dante, and Pul watched them from a certain distance. After a few seconds of silence:

  — By the way… are you a waiter? You? I was very surprised when the old man told me. Ah, and don’t worry, I paid for last night’s damages.

  — Yeah, and do you have a problem with that?

  — The one who should have a problem with that is you, especially when you were a more competent opponent than Agnar. I didn’t even try to kill him.

  — Well, the soldiers last night told me how you tried to roast him alive.

  — Ha… no commander with the mission of killing me would fall for something so basic. On the other hand, I tried to kill you three times, and you reacted quickly to each one of my attacks. Especially the first one: I thought you were drunk, but when you dodged the shot I thought I had fallen into a trap.

  — It was just my reflexes and luck. It was live or die. Besides, you were probably tired after escaping from Agnar.

  Ash remained silent for a moment… and then let out a restrained laugh, amused.

  Already at the entrance of the place, the two stopped in front of a curtain made of strips of different colors. Dante entered first, followed by Ash, while Pul stayed on the other side of the street, leaning against the wall, watching them from afar.

  The place was considerably full. Dante and Ash sat at the end of the counter, right near the entrance, since they were the only seats available. After settling in, Ash took a moment to observe the surroundings. His gaze rested on the kitchen, which was visible to everyone.

  Three men were in charge of preparing the food. One detail that caught Ash’s attention was how they cooked: they used magic. It was not the first time he had seen that method, but most of the people he knew who understood the subject were strictly traditional, and cooked everything by hand.

  Perhaps it was that the country’s culture influenced foreign cuisine. After all, the Mongols never had a territory especially rich in resources. Maybe that was why they developed a very pragmatic form of education: learning to use everything they had within reach. It was not necessary to mention that, thanks to that, they had stood out incredibly in the art of war, always innovating new ways of fighting.

  — Are they multifaceted mages?

  — It’s pronounced polyfaceted, and no, they’re more like telekinetic mages.

  — I see, so they’re from Edo.

  — Now it’s called Nihon.

  — And is it still an empire?

  — Officially it’s a kingdom. It lost a quarter of its territory within the continent and now it’s treated more like an island.

  — And what about the north?

  — Basically... now there are only two enormous countries, and inside them there are around ten nations. It was a very complicated period, from what I remember being told in school.

  — Well, that’s enough, I’ll inform myself better later.

  Ash grabbed one of the menus available on the counter and, pretending to read it, took out the cellphone he conveniently had not returned last night because he had forgotten. Hidden from Dante, he searched through the contacts and selected Mingghan’s, whose identity was Agnar. He sent him a message:

  — Hey, it’s me, the first one. Dante might contact you to ask something, just tell him yes.

  Agnar, who was standing at the commander’s station in his command center, inside a dark room dimly illuminated by blue lights, moderately spacious and filled with screens of different sizes placed over desks and hanging from the walls, was surprised. Not only because he had been asked to cooperate with the dangerous criminal who was most likely plotting something against his “nephew,” but also because of the speed with which he had learned to handle the device used to communicate, one that he himself had forgotten to retrieve. He put away his phone and continued investigating his next target, which was displayed on the main screen.

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  Before Dante could look away from the delicious food being prepared, Ash put the cellphone away and asked the nearest chef, showing him the menu, to prepare the dish he pointed at with his finger.

  — This one? Are you sure, sir? It’s the most expensive, and it’s mainly meant for two people — said the chef.

  — No problem, I basically haven’t eaten anything for eighty years, and prepare it as fast as you possibly can, please — Ash replied.

  The chef informed his two companions in his native language and they immediately began cooking with their powers. The first cook took care of preparing the ingredients. Since they could manipulate things essentially with their minds, it could be seen how he cut, washed, and boiled all the vegetables and meat at the same time, without moving a single finger and in only a few seconds.

  Then the ingredients passed to the second one, who was in charge of the broths. He received the prepared ingredients and placed them floating in the air in front of him. It could be seen how he removed the excess liquids from the foods that had been boiled, without leaving them dry, and then proceeded to cut them. Just like that, he divided the ingredients into their respective parts and shapes.

  Finally, the ingredients passed to the chef who had received the order. While he attended the customers, behind him it could be seen how he prepared the noodles: the dough kneaded itself, was cut, and then boiled simultaneously. Whenever an order was made, this last chef took everything previously prepared, pulled out a bowl with his powers from where they were stored, and took the corresponding portion of noodles. As if it were the work of some god, all that labor fit perfectly into the bowl like a pleasant puzzle. This showed that the last one was the most skilled mage of the three.

  And after no more than ten seconds had passed, Ash already had his lunch ready to be eaten. He wasted no time grabbing a pair of chopsticks, separating them and adjusting them for use, and began eating without waiting for the food to cool down.

  After swallowing the first bite, he lifted his head and exclaimed passionately:

  — MMMMM! DAMN! You’ve exceeded all my expectations! This is literally the best ramen in the world. My congratulations, gentlemen, you’ve earned a customer for life.

  The three chefs became very happy and showed humble smiles on their faces. Dante looked at Ash, surprised; he truly had not expected that reaction.

  Ash looked at Dante and noticed that he was staring at him as well, so he said:

  — You look surprised, and that’s without me telling you the good news yet.

  — What news?

  — Didn’t Agnar tell you yet?

  — Tell me what?

  — Well, you see — Ash said while eating — last night, while negotiating with Agnar, we talked about my payment, equipment, and transportation, but after agreeing on all that we came up short regarding my stay. Suddenly he said, “you know, you could stay with Dante, he lives alone and isn’t home very often” — while Ash gestured as if reenacting the conversation — and I said, “Really? Do you think he’ll feel comfortable with the guy who tried to kill him an hour ago?” And he answered, “Don’t worry, I’ll talk to him, just apologize and with luck that will be enough.” And well, here we are.

  — So all of this was Agnar’s idea.

  Dante, annoyed, wastes no time and takes out his phone; he quickly sends a message to Agnar.

  Agnar, meanwhile, is working on a strategy against his next target. Suddenly, he takes out his cellphone and sees that he has a message from Dante, so he proceeds to read it. The message says: “How did it even occur to you to send the psychopath to live with me?”

  Agnar comments to himself:

  — Ahhhh… so that’s what the bastard meant.

  At that moment he freezes, faced with two options: the first, to deny it; whatever Ash might be planning would be ruined or, at the very least, complicated. The second, to cooperate as Ash wanted and thus push his dear nephew into the hands of a madman. Of course, anyone in Agnar’s position would choose the first option, but after thinking about it for a moment, he also saw the opportunity to gain something he might never achieve otherwise. If he fulfilled his role as a good uncle, Dante would most likely continue wasting his life and never become anything; but by taking part in Ash’s plan, Agnar could help guide the talented Dante toward where he believed he truly belonged.

  A crossroads: be a good uncle or fulfill his own selfish desires? Even if those desires came from good intentions. Agnar needed no further thought and finished his reply with a message:

  — Can’t you handle that?

  Faced with the response, Dante threw a small, almost imperceptible tantrum. Ash, noticing this while slurping the noodles, smiled slightly.

  After finishing his meal, he said to the angry Dante:

  — Wow, do you hate the idea that much?

  Dante did not reply and remained staring at him in annoyance. Ash finished the last bite from the bowl and, after wiping his mouth with a napkin, said:

  — Alright, no problem. I assumed it would be a bad idea from the start. Let’s do this: if you pay, I’ll tell Agnar I’ll find a place on my own and you can go back to living peacefully, alright?

  Dante, now with his arms crossed, thought about it for a moment. He had not expected this problem to be solved so easily, but in the end, people from the past really were that simple. Finally, he replied:

  — Alright.

  Ash ordered another dish.

  — Wait, another one? — Dante said, his wallet already trembling.

  — I’m just taking advantage of the situation. Isn’t this cheaper than living with me? — Ash subtly threatened.

  After a few seconds, Dante gave in and let him eat in peace; after all, paying for two expensive dishes did not compare to living with a killer.

  — Ah, by the way, can you notify Agnar? I know you people can communicate through those things called cellphones.

  — Yeah, you’re right, I’ll do it now.

  Dante stepped out to the entrance of the place, took out his phone, and called Agnar. While waiting for him to answer, he saw Pul still watching them and gave him a discreet wave with his hand.

  As soon as Dante left the restaurant, Ash caught the chef’s attention and smiled.

  When the call connected, Agnar answered:

  — Well, well, look who it is, my favorite failure. What took you so much “time” to call me?

  — Yeah, sure. I only called to tell you that Ash will look for a place on his own, so try to keep your strange ideas to yourself.

  Agnar replied:

  — What a shame. I was hoping this would give you a different perspective on your life. After all, he’s from your grandfather’s era, so I thought this would finally convince you to join my team.

  While he spoke, behind Dante, people passing near the restaurant began stopping one by one to see what was happening inside. Dante, still facing the street at a comfortable distance, continued talking on the phone.

  As for Pul, he began moving his head, searching for a better angle, since the crowd forming behind Dante was starting to block Ash from his view. Uneasy, he left his observation spot and began looking for a clearer line of sight.

  While this was happening, Dante said to Agnar:

  — Look, you need to understand that what you want isn’t what I want, so I’m asking you, uncle, don’t insist on that again. I will never ever get involved in military affairs, so goodbye.

  And with that, Dante ended the call.

  Pul, now quite uneasy because he could no longer see Ash, decided to move. He crossed the street to confirm his target’s position. Dante noticed this but completely ignored him. Pul passed beside Dante, who lost sight of him. When Dante looked toward the restaurant, he saw a crowd gathering at the entrance. Surprised and concerned by the sudden change in atmosphere, he pushed through the people, trying to reach the source of the situation, which surely had to be Ash’s doing.

  When he finally reached the front of the crowd, he saw that Ash was simply sitting there, eating calmly. However, the state of the table had changed noticeably: towers — no, skyscrapers — of bowls covered the entire four-and-a-half-meter table. Ash, swallowing his last bite, turned to look at Dante and said:

  — Well, now I’m satisfied. Remember, you’re paying.

  Dante’s expression was priceless. He stood there, mouth wide open, staring at how far the towers of bowls extended. But as if that were not enough, the chef who had been attending the customers — now completely drenched in sweat but still in better condition than his companions, who looked as if they had just run a marathon — tapped him on the shoulder and said:

  — This man is not human.

  He then showed him that, on the kitchen side, there were even more stacks of bowls. Dante was incapable of changing his expression and, after learning this new information, he dropped to his knees and went into shock.

  After the place had emptied considerably and Dante mentally recovered, he began to think:

  The dish Ash ordered cost around eleven Mons, and he had devoured three hundred and eighteen bowls. How was that even possible? Was he a troll disguised as a human? No, only an ogre could accomplish something like that. There was no escape, especially once the chef learned that I had agreed to pay. Pul was one of the first witnesses to see such a massacre; I think he was even a little traumatized. Three thousand four hundred and ninety-eight Mons turned out to be the bill. My boss would never give me an advance like that, and the bank would never lend me that amount, not to mention that the credit card debt would bring difficult times.

  Ash watched me very calmly while I suffered; he seemed to enjoy it a lot, and at that moment what I believed about why he enjoyed it so much made me think he was some kind of sadist. The reason, however, was very different and far more calculated.

  Ash, seated on one of the stools, appeared to be waiting for his food to finish cooking and began to speak:

  — Well, it seems the time has come for you to pay.

  Dante looked at Ash with intense fury; one of his eyes had already begun to twitch. He looked at the chef, then at Ash, and kept alternating between them for several seconds.

  — What’s wrong? Don’t you have the money?

  Dante looked at the head chef and said:

  — Look… I know I have to pay, but the problem is that I can’t, not right now — or rather, not all of it. But I can give you what I have or pay part of it with my card. Still, I’ve gotten myself into a really bad situation.

  The chef replied:

  — I know it’s a lot, and I also know you got screwed over, but a bet is a bet, and this Oni — he pointed at Ash — has eaten all the food we had left.

  Dante looked at Ash and walked toward him.

  — What are you planning? This was Agnar’s idea, wasn’t it?

  — Agnar? — Ash asked, confused.

  — Yes, he’s the only one who would help me with something like this, but only in exchange for working for him.

  — Hahaha, you certainly are perceptive. However, this wasn’t Agnar’s idea, and it’s not so you can work for him — it’s so you can work with me.

  — What? Never! You tried to kill me! You buried me in debt! I’d rather end up on the street than work for a psychopath.

  Ash laughed under his breath.

  — Heh heh heh, it seems you misunderstood. I’m proposing a partnership, and I’m not a psychopath… well, at least not for the most part.

  — That changes nothing. All you do is kill and kill, you’re a monster. You should be in hell.

  — From what I know, it seems I’ll never end up there. Well, look, the pay will be good. Besides, you’re not cut out to be a waiter; it’s obvious you were born to fight. And besides, Nair would probably like a strong and heroic man, and she’d be very happy to work with you.

  Dante fell silent. All the chefs and Pul were left stunned, watching the conversation — if it could even be called that.

  Ash began to feel a bloodlust coming from Dante, who did not take his eyes off him, like a predator about to have dinner. Ash started moving his fingers, his arms positioning themselves at the sides of his body, as if preparing to draw in a gun duel.

  The tension only kept growing. Pul, without lowering his guard, prepared himself to intervene in whatever was about to happen, while the chefs slowly stepped back on their side of the kitchen.

  At the peak of the situation, Dante turned around and headed toward the exit, leaving with a:

  — Go rot.

  Ash shouted at him:

  — Stop right there! Or else…

  Dante interrupted him, speaking over his shoulder:

  — Or else what? You’ll force me?

  Ash began walking very slowly to the side, moving his fingers toward Dante as if performing a magic trick, and continued:

  — Or else, I’ll reveal your little secret.

  Dante turned a quarter of the way back and looked at Ash.

  — What? What the hell are you talking about?

  — You know, last night at the bar, those three times…

  The first chef said:

  — What? You slept together? Three times? That’s a lot. I wish I could last more than three minutes, my girlfriend would be happy.

  — What?! No! — Ash replied — Stop making things up. What would you even know about me? You’re just saying nonsense based on whatever you heard from Agnar.

  Ash pulled a stack of bills from the inside pocket of his coat and threw it onto the table in front of the chefs.

  — This should be more than enough. And if you don’t mind, I’d like you to leave us alone for a few minutes. We’ll be leaving afterward.

  The chefs, very happy but somewhat intimidated, quietly left through the back of the restaurant. Ash looked at Pul and said:

  — You too.

  Pul, without reacting or commenting, walked straight out through the front of the place, and on his way forced the last two customers — who were finishing their meals — to leave as well.

  Once the restaurant was empty, Ash raised his right hand and snapped his fingers, releasing small blue sparks. Then he approached Dante and said, covering his mouth from Pul’s line of sight so he could not read his lips:

  — You didn’t dodge my fourth attack last night.

  Dante froze, staring at the floor. Ash continued:

  — You avoided the first three attacks easily, but the fourth one hit you directly. I could tell you every hypothesis that crossed my mind, but I’ll only tell you the real one.

  Dante raised his gaze and fixed his eyes on Ash’s. He noticed they were different colors and saw a victorious expression on his face. Through those eyes, Dante perceived his own expression: that of a man about to lose and unable to do anything to prevent it.

  — The reason you couldn’t dodge my fourth attack is because it wasn’t lethal… So tell me, at the very least I killed you three times last night, didn’t I?

  Dante’s hands began to tremble. It seemed his secret had been discovered and, for some reason, he did not want to admit it.

  Ash, already triumphant, walked past the paralyzed Dante and, as he headed out the door, said:

  — I’ll come looking for you at your house tomorrow, so quit your job. It would be a problem if you didn’t inform them.

  Already outside the restaurant, in a raised voice, Ash added:

  — And by the way, never ever say never ever.

  Shortly afterward, at the command center, Agnar felt his phone receive a message. It was from Pul’s phone, and it read:

  — I WON.

  

  

  

  

  

  

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