I gazed numbly after the storming figure of Aria. Being left to my own devices with the sleeping Bella in my arms. A twisted sense of uncertainty, fear, and shock lingering in my mind after the terrifying exchange.
I sighed, my face dropping with a fresh sense of relief.
Damn… she almost killed me… I would never have expected that Aria would turn on me, she was adamant to keep me safe from the time I got acquainted with her. In contradiction to all that, here I am narrowly escaping with my life only because she heard me saying a few words to myself.
I gulped, a shiver passing through my body as I recalled the terrible memory.
I bit my lips, pressing them into a thin line, making sure that I could not speak a word of my thoughts even by accident. I mean, I had this harmless habit when I used to talk to myself aloud back in my previous life. It’s better to hear your own words than nothing after all… and back then I hardly had such a soothing voice as now…
I shook my head as a twisted sense of discomfort marred my insides from the thought. That was the root of all my current problems. Well, most of them anyway.
Still, the question remained. What was even so bad about blood magic to garner such a reputation? I seriously felt like the weight of Aria’s words and concerns were flying above my head. She clearly distrusted, well… no, that would be an understatement. She more likely was utterly revolted and disgusted by blood mages.
Remembering the disappointed and hurt look in her eyes as she pinned me to the bed, I felt another hurtful twist in my guts. My shoulders dropped under the weight of my predicament.
What did I get myself into?
Another sigh left my chest. I din’t have a lot of ways to figure out something about what made blood magic so terrible at the moment. However, I had one way to gain some insight.
Obviously, I was not intending to practice blood magic, that would have been the stupidest thing to attempt. What I was about to do was simply to recall the incantation of it silently in my mind.
One thing I learned about magic is that without speaking the words of an incantation, you can hardly activate it. Since blood magic seems to be similar to my ice shaping spell, meaning that after activating it with an incantation, the control of the spell solely relies on your imagination. It should be safe to recall the incantation in one’s mind without speaking it.
Let’s see… I closed my eyes and delved into the small archive of magic spells and incantations Lord Axis has provided me at the start of my journey.
Focusing my thoughts on blood magic, the incantations swiftly come to my mind. I pressed my lips shut with a conscious effort as I recalled the ritualistic words.
To my slight surprise, even thinking about the incantation made me feel an unnatural sense of discomfort. An ominous presence fell over me while I recalled the words.
Gods above and Devils below! All shall bear witness upon these words, for I vow that blood is the key of salvation.
Words filled with pulsing power that made my body shiver with a revolting sense of thirst and desire. There was a prickling sensation running through my veins, an unusual excitement. I was standing on a precipice, one step away from doom or ascension. Yet the promise of glory, the chance to satiate that unnatural hunger which I haven’t known of before, shadowed all sense of self preservation.
My lips wanted to move… to speak thy words, yet through sheer willpower I kept them close as I thought about the rest of the incantation.
For only through the power of blood can one cast away the shackles of mortal coil and breach the gates of Heavens.
My entire being shivered with the promises of power, its raw potential, the alluring sense of control that would allow me to mold the entire world to my heart’s desire, shape it, create it, or destroy it.
Not just to gaze upon the altar of eternity, but to assail it, and call it one’s own, becoming the true master of life.
An inherent wrongness took hold of my insides while cold shivers raked over my skin like hundreds of crawling centipedes. There was a sense of revulsion, something one feels when they taste something rotten. Under the overly sweet taste, there was a sickness, a malady that wrought destruction and brought famine. Still, above everything else, the promise of power hailed through, shining through the skies with its sweet-sweet glory. Then silence. Silence which descended into the distant sounds of pulsing blood, and the rumbling of a quickening heart’s palpitations giving a sense of urgency.
When the incantation finally came to its end. The glory of power faded in my mind, leaving behind a hollow sense of emptiness. Somehow, I felt less than I was before, more shallow, incomplete… weak.
I shuddered, alarmed by the fresh taste of blood filling my mouth. Then the sudden spike of pain from my lips jolted me out of my trance.
I parted my shivering lips in alarm just realising that I have bitten into my own flesh, drawing blood unconsciously.
Then I noticed the shaking of my body… My heart was pounding furiously and I realized that what I heard was my own heart about to jump out of my chest. The internal hammering against my ribcage was almost painful. I winced, trying to calm myself with measured breathing.
My eyes went wide from the fear that clawed into my insides as the power of the spell travelled through me. I shuddered, panic grating at the edges of my mind as I instinctively shrunk on myself, like a child who have done something terrible and now attempted to hide from the consequences.
What was that?
The thought shattered the shocked silence of my mind.
I have never felt anything like that before. I panted, my skin covered with a cold layer of sweat.
The spells I used so far had unique sensations, side effects, usually connected to their elements. I figured that the more powerful the effects were, the more powerful the spell was.
When I closed my eyes, I could feel the blood in my veins traveling through every part of my body. The prickling sensation, the ways it twisted and turned, following the path of my veins. It’s rapid pulsation with every beat of my heart. It sang to me, craving my attention with alluring whispers of power, its sheer potential. I shivered. Why did I still feel it?
Recalling the effects of the golem creation spell, I clearly remembered that it made me feel as if I was chewing through mud and earth. Almost giving me a sense of suffocation, but it went away after I finished the spell. Why didn’t it go away this time?
An ominous suspicion haunted my thoughts. Wait… did… did it work even without speaking the words out loud, but how could that be?
I shuddered, closing my eyes once again, trying to calm myself. Yet the action seemed to achieve the opposite effect. I grow aware of more presences. More blood calling out to me in their soft, alluring songs, whispering in the back of my mind. It was maddening.
I could feel the soft warmth of Bella’s blood, it’s gentle song as her little heart circulated her fragile life essence, as it twisted and turned in her thin flexible veins. It wanted to be controlled, harnessed.
I pushed the girl’s sleeping body away from me as if I was burned by fire. I crawled backwards, falling off the bed in an unorganized frantic motion.
I only stopped my backpedalling when I reached one of the corners of the room. I was wheezing from the stress and the sense of panic.
Okay… okay! I grabbed my head with both arms, trying to focus my thoughts. So… the spell has definitely worked somehow. Fucking great, that is…
I glanced back at Bella, the young girl was drowsily raising her head from the side of the bed. Of course she was… I practically tossed her aside like a bag of potatoes. It is normal that she woke up, expected even.
A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.
Now let’s take a few slow breaths Selora, you are a witch, remember? YOu hAve CaSt sPells befORe…
So think… how do you stop a channeling spell?
My mind seemed to provide the answer for that, as the memory of a short closing incantation swam in front of my mental eyes for this specific magic.
I murmured the words internally, desperately hoping that it will work.
Blood is the key.
As the words formed in my mind, the distracting sensation of several pulsing presences and their alluring siren songs faded away. Soon enough, everything seemed to turn back to normal. The thirst for power, the songs, the alluring whispers of fulfilled desires, the sense of presences all dispersed, leaving behind but a vague sense of emptiness. I felt like I was stripped from my sixth sense, a fact which brought me both joy and sorrow.
I couldn’t care about that, however. I was simply thankful that the change wasn’t permanent. I was not sure how long could I withstand the lure of power, when it was just a stretch of an arm away.
I breathed a long sigh of relief.
Could this day become even more chaotic? And how the hell did that incantation work without speaking the words!? It shouldn’t be possible…
My left eye twitched from the stress.
Yeah… well… not like I actually know anything about magic aside from casting spells… I simply deducted that no spell with an incantation worked so far without speaking the words aloud, but I could hardly make a general law out of trying ten or so spells.
I looked up at sounds of soft steps approaching, startled by the lack of presences after the spell’s effects waned.
Bella was standing in front of me, curiously glancing at my haunted expression. Her hand reached towards me, and I flinched unconsciously from her touch. Something that caused the little girl a lot of mirth based on the smugness on her face.
“I won’t hurt big sister… you don’t have to be afraid of Bella.” — She said with a barely hidden chuckle.
I felt my heart calm from the girl’s gesture. She would not understand that I was not afraid of her… but from myself, to lose control of my magic, and that is how it should be.
One thing I have managed to carve into my very being by this unfortunate venture was that blood magic was not feared for no reason. I was pretty sure now, especially after recalling that unholy incantation… Assailing the Gods? Breaching the gates of Heaven? I am pretty sure that if I ever mention this incantation to Aria. She is going to gut me like a fish. She clearly had no idea that the spell could be cast wordlessly… not that I had, but it was not me who lived in this world for six hundred so years.
Now… I definitely know why Aria reacted that way to blood magic. If the power carried by that cursed incantation was this vindictive when spoken internally. How shattering its effects would be when spoken out loud? I could clearly recall the desire to speak the words, it can only mean that their effects would have multiplied.
I did not want to think about that… the raw power of the magic terrified me. I was not ready to wield such terrible power. I have barely cast a few spells so far…
But… I couldn’t seem to shake the thought out of my head. I wanted to practice it. I wanted to learn how to wield this power; it called to me. It wanted to be used. I gulped down my saliva, alarmed by my own unreasonable desire to wield this power. It was tainting my thoughts.
I turned to Bella… and my insides froze over with dread.
Why did Aria leave me alone with this little girl after she realized I was a blood mage? Have she lost her rationality, or was she testing me per chance?
I didn’t like either of the options, but now at least I understood it on a visceral level.
I shook my head violently.
No, I won’t practice it now… Maybe… maybe later…
The sense of hollowness I felt before seemed to echo through my being. Disappointment, ambition, impatience.
I scampered to my feet and run out of the room, ignoring the faint calls of Bella behind me. I run and run until I found myself outside of the mansion among the sea of fluorescent moss and giant mushrooms. There, I sat down under one of the massive caps of a mushroom. Luckily, I was still wearing the clothes I put on in the morning, since in my desire to get away, I hardly checked if I was wearing anything at all.
I huffed, shrugging my shoulders.
I need some time to think, preferably alone. To sort out what happened… Of course, the universe was not so keen on letting me have what I wanted.
Sounds of familiar steps approached my location. I turned my eyes towards the other elf, who seemed to notice me at the same time.
We exchanged a long tense look, then she sighed and walked closer with a pretended calmness.
“I told you,” — She began with frustration. — “do not run around alone, like a headless chicken. I am meant to be your escort from now on.” — The spoken words rang hollow in my ears, there was a different meaning to them after all. She just had to use that headless chicken metaphor, didn’t she? Now I was feeling the woman’s vindictive nature, the one that Camilla experienced through our escape from the dark ones. Not that she didn’t deserve it, meanwhile I didn’t feel quite so deserving of her attention.
Nevertheless… She was warning me something along the lines that I thought you were trying to run away, and stop acting like that or there will be consequences you won’t like.
I felt a burst of annoyance, but remembering to my recent experiment with my powers, I quickly clammed up and nodded to the elf’s warning. — “Sorry… didn’t mean to startle you… I-I just needed some air, the room felt suffocating.”
Aria’s gaze hovered over my bandaged neck, her expression softened somewhat, nodding back to me as a sign of acknowledgment.
“Alright… but next time warn me beforehand. I will give you some space, I will be right over there.” — She pointed towards a section of the outer wall of the mansion. I nodded with a soft sigh and pulled my knees closer to my chest.
It seems solitude is not something I can hope for in the near future. Blood mages apparently don’t get to run around freely, not that I am surprised by that after my recent experience.
I wondered if I should mention something about the wordless incantation to Aria. I glanced towards the forest elf woman who was presently checking the edge of her dagger in the magical light of a lantern. Then continued to clean off the blood… a shiver went through my body, as I realized that it was my blood she was cleaning off.
Um… I quickly decided with the added visual representation, quite easily I might add, that I shouldn’t mention anything about my recent discoveries to said woman. Not now, nor ever.
I gulped again, somehow managing to pull my limbs even tighter around me under the shade of the large mushroom cap.
Ugh… I feel like a pig waiting for her slaughter. Now I seriously wanted that teleport spell, the one I lied about to the dwarves. Which supposedly sent me to the deep roads. My stomach twisted and turn in my anxiety.
Ugh… how am I supposed to attempt influencing the war and global politics when Aria is hovering over my head watching my every step? There is no way she would let me get into a meaningful position of power while she knows that I am a blood mage.
Why didn’t Lord Axis warn me about this… no, the better question is why did he give me such evil power in the first place? I cannot see any reason for a God of Creation to wield such powers to begin with, not even mentioning offering them to their followers. What would have happened to me if I used it against the goblins back there?
I would have been lynched by the mob of dwarves right on the spot.
Could it be that Lord Axis was not the benevolent God he told himself to be? Not… not that he told that in any way or form… I merely assumed. My face dropped considerably.
Fuck me sideways… Am I actually following some sort of crazy, gender bending, blood thirsty, cult leading, brainwashing, abomination-god-thing?
I mean… it’s not the first time he screwed me over… Stealing my name, tinkering with my memories, then turning me into a woman, only to pause answering my prayers without prior warning or explanation. Just to now unassumingly teach me the equivalent of this world’s Satanism, except that in this world, it actually works.
Oh boy… This is not looking good for me… not at all! I will have to read up on Axis, the God of Creation… I believe there was a library of sorts here.
I sprung to my feet, with a new goal appearing in front of my eyes. I stepped out from the shade of the shroom and was about to head back into the mansion when the voice of Aria called out to me.
“Now, where are you heading?” — I froze, not used to the other elf tailing me everywhere. Still, I answered her question.
“Well… I heard there was a library of sorts in the mansion. I want to look into something…” — My words made the older elf frown. I quickly realized how she might have misunderstood my meaning.
I blushed from my frustration and said before she could make an unfortunate conclusion. — “It’s nothing like that, I assure you…” — My vivid opposition only seemed to strengthen her suspicion, unfortunately.
She offered me a polite but strict smile. — “Why don’t you tell me what you are curious about, I have seen a lot of things, and read quite a few books in my time. I might be able to help you sort out things.”
My smile strained listening to her comment. She definitely doesn’t want to let me near the library now… how cute. On another hand, what she says is quite reasonable. She might be able to tell me what I want to know.
I turned to her and asked my question with a polite nod. — “I wanted to learn more about Axis, the God of Creation. If you know anything interesting about him, his nature and other things, I would be happy to listen.”
Aria’s eyebrows raised in genuine surprise, hearing my inquiry. — “You mean Axis, the Two Faced? The Ancient God of Creation and Chaos?” — She measured me with an unamused stare, before she added with a twist of mischief. — “The one you have been praying to so zealously every night and morning?”
I made a face at the realization. Had the shameless elf listened in on my prayers? I glared at her, quite disturbed by the idea.
She noticed my glare and sighed theatrically. — “No. I did not listen into your prayers, idiot girl. It’s common curtesy among elves to not do so. I merely caught a few snippets before I could close off my hearing towards your direction.” — She frowned at her own words, then added regretfully. — “Regarding recent revelations, maybe I should have listened. Alas, at the time I believed you to be a follower of creation, while recent inquiries have made it clear that you are but a tool of chaos.”
I blinked, trying to assimilate the new information provided by the elf. Two faced god, creation, and chaos? I sweat dropped. Everything started to make sense now, all the pieces I couldn’t figure out were finally falling into the right place. My face darkened in the wake of the powerful revelation, which I only suspected so far.
I was cooked.